Artwork, is, well, work.

"Untitled Spirit"
5.5x8.5
Sharpie pen

I like to think that I am more self-disciplined than the average person.  However, I still find that I could improve in this area.  For instance, I have not kept my promise of drawing something at least once every weekday.  This is clearly detrimental to my goals of becoming a professional artist, yet I have chosen not to take this helpful step.  Why?  

Part of it is fear, fear that I'm not good enough, that I'll never be good enough, and I will always work for the man.  (By not practicing my art, I very nearly ensure that this will be the case).  The latter isn't particularly bothersome, but I feel I cannot live up to my artistic potential, my creative potential, by doing so.  I have always been bound by my desire for security, and the idea of lacking a steady paycheck with benefits wrapped into it is troubling.  Still, I dream of spending my days creating and marketing my art.  It would be amazing to work with my hands and mind in synchronization.

Discipline is doing something towards a goal, anyway, no matter what.  It's recognizing the consequences of action and inaction, and working towards improvement when it would be easier not to.  The idea of art is wonderful.  For me, the creative process is exhausting.  I made two sketches yesterday, one of which is posted here.  I got to the point where, instead of refining the second drawing, I got tired.  I felt my muse run dry, the flow ebbing away to dry sand and sawdust in my mind.  This is where discipline must step in and push creativity onward, and this is where I failed.  I was done, and simply didn't want to go on any further.  I have plenty of self-discipline when it comes to cooking, cleaning, housework, staying fit, and getting myself to my day job.  When it comes to my art, it is a notable area where improvement is possible.  I've already identified that some of the housework could and should be allowed to slide to make more room for creative time.  Now it is a matter of action.